“There’s something in the air” my friend said. “It’s like I don’t know who to trust anymore or what’s real.” We walked down the sidewalk dodging, joggers, trash cans, lawn decorations and campaign signs. But then is started to rain, the streets quieted, and we happily accepted that we would just be wet as we walked. We noticed the dark grey clouds full of moisture, the colorful mushrooms popping up everywhere and I bent down to clear red leaves from the storm drain. If the heavy rains are coming, the water will need somewhere to go.
Instability
Between the election, global conflicts, and the climate crisis, it is often difficult to stay grounded. There is a feeling of instability and mistrust, especially when it comes to finding reliable sources of information. Like my friend on the walk, thoughtful people often feel higher levels of instability because of their desire to genuinely understand and respond appropriately to the situations they are faced with. In an age of misinformation, we find ourselves exhausted from sifting through questionable information as we try to make choices that line up with our values. This can lead to feelings of isolation, disillusionment and apathy, leading to higher levels of depression and anxiety.
Wild Ride Ahead
I am likely not alone in sensing that we are in for a wild ride for the next few months, especially as the holiday also approach. Politicians and corporations are fighting for our attention and holding out a promise that they can fix things and make you feel safe and secure, prosperous and successful. I believe wholeheartedly in doing our due diligence by voting by our conscience and with others in mind. I can’t help but to know deep in my bones that the collective instability we are experienced is unlikely to be fixed by a politician or a product. Even within our personal lives, many of us need to look no further than the holiday dinner table for stressful family interactions and reminders of family discord or loss.
Grounding is Intentional
How are we to live when our sense of concern about the world is rising? How do we find direction and peace when the world seems to be swirling? There is a sense of calm and peace that we can tap into if we pause and take some time to be human. Here are some ideas to ground us during chaotic times. I don’t know about you, but I need a plan!
- Put the phone down. Limit your access to news and social media to give yourself breaks from information. People often fall into the trap of over consuming media either to “escape” or with the intention to feel more in control. An hour can easily pass “zoning out” producing no great relief or insight. Device addiction is real. Interrupt the emotional self-soothing cycle by taking an hour break from your phone during the day several times a day and by removing the phone from your bedroom at night. Instead of scrolling, go on a walk, play with your pet, listen to music, or fold that mountain of laundry sitting on your bed.
- Take small intentional actions towards the local justice causes that you feel drawn to. Volunteer at the food pantry or animal shelter. Make a donation to your local school or domestic violence shelter. Join your local government. Turn your worry into some kind of action. Somewhere between having full control and no control at all is a zone of influence. In this zone, we can do our small part to make a meaningful difference.
- Stop and help people in your path with everyday things. Make it a way of life. Help an elderly shopper put bags into their car. Give up your seat for someone who can stand for a long time when waiting or riding public transportation. Help a mom on the airplane with preschool children to put her luggage in the overhead bin. Give someone a ride. Ask someone if they are okay if you’re not sure. Wait on people without rushing them, even if you have to say to yourself, “I can wait”. Small acts of kindness are reminders that there is good in this world and that people matter. Doing activities that line up the with your values is coincidentally good for your mental health too!
- Slow down and do less. If you are single parent or working multiple jobs, this may not be an option. Down time is important to help people to process emotions and thoughts. If you are able to slow down, make a cup of tea and stare into space. Play a card game with you partner or child. Breathe and be aware of your surroundings without criticism or judgment. Allow your mind to wander, to be bored, or to put thoughts together that didn’t make sense before. You may find that a problem you have been trying to solve for weeks suddenly has a solution. You may find that your heart rate comes down and you suddenly remember that you are human.
- Observe nature. It is in observing nature that we often become aware of a world outside of ourselves. A civilization of ants or geese flying overhead in a V-shape remind us that life pushes forward with or without us. Engaging our senses and breathing the fresh air can ground us in the natural world and relieve stress and anxiety. Observing the moon and stars can bring into perspective how small we are. Even a 10-minute break outside can make all the difference.
- Socially engage with friends in person. Meet a friend for lunch face to face. Take turns talking and listening. Share stories and be truthful about your fears. Feel like you don’t have friends? Prioritize developing friendships by turning some of your time on social media into time with people in person in an exercise class, art class or a book club at the library. Meeting new friends can be hard, but living life without friendship is harder. The effort is worth it.
- Practice curiosity. There is great joy in learning about the world and about other people. Much of our searching and researching online is about following the rabbit trail of our curiosity. Learn something new by subscribing to a new YouTube channel or by signing up for a workshop or class. Pick up a non-fiction book and take a deep dive into something you’ve always wanted to learn about. Learn about important topics that don’t make it into the news cycle. You might find that learning something new is the escape you’ve been looking for. Go ahead and geek out!
As this busy season approaches, you might find that having a plan now will help you to get through the uncertainty to come. How might you be intentional about your time in the coming months so that you can stay grounded? Share your ideas with a friend or leave a comment on this post. What are your ideas? We’d love to hear them.